Dateline: Nov & Dec 2022. Well I've been on a run lately, canceling numerous friendships. Perhaps my low tolerance for emotional weakness has reached new depths. Perhaps this has been an unusual set of coincidences. Perhaps it's me & my short fuse slash irritability (whaaaat, me?). Let's count them up.
3 local platonic friends
Met all on a dating app. No love connection but that's ok, female friends are valuable.
One told me 'you need to learn your love language because women dig that.' And indeed, I do see that mentioned on app profiles here & there. No idea what it is but clearly, it's a chick thing, same as stand up paddleboarding & cooking classes. My reply to her suggestion: 'if I start reading about love languages it will turn me into a homo.'
Now I know firsthand what 'triggered' means.
Another showed me pics of her diy home improvement project. Unknown to me, I did not react with the desired level of enthusiasm. Two weeks later we're having lunch and out of the blue she brings up my lack of interest in those pics. Then, wait for it, the crying. Openly. Tears, all of it. Just like that. As if I had done something actually wrong or mean. The next day on the blower I told her I didn't dig being perceived as a villain for not jumping with joy at home improvement pics.
Her reply: 'don't worry about it, we're done.' Click.
Yet another was ignoring my hey how's it going sms or giving 1-word answers. I eventually sms:
'we done?'
'done with what'
'with our friendship. I can type slower if that helps.'
her reply: middle finger symbol. And I had my answer.
Bonus nutter. Met on app also & she's out of state, she reached out to me, I replied, why not, bored. We had a pleasant video chat. Later we're sms, I tell her I'm a movie fan, lately documentaries. Her reply: I can't watch documentaries because I'm so sensitive they affect me for days. Um, wtf? I tell her you should try 'my octopus teacher' on netflix, it's a nature doc. In fact in my profile bio, it mentions that movie stating if you're not moved by it all the best. That's how much I dig it.
She replies a couple days later: 'enjoyed chatting with you. Just wanted to share that having that movie as a dating dealbreaker made me feel pressured & uncomfortable. I'm not going to watch it. If that's an issue no problem I understand.'
Yeah. Pressured & uncomfortable, over a nature documentary. Nip that in the bud. Nothing to nip actually. Language.
Another. Worked with her way back in the 90s. Haven't seen her since. Reconnected this year on fb. She starts asking me about the FTX meltdown. I reply why the interest? Her: because I've never studied money or economics my entire life & I thought I should start. Me: what have you been doing the last 3 decades? Something more important than your financial future? Here's a Ral Dalio vid, watch that, ignore the FTX stuff it's not where to start. Her: no reply. Guess that's another click.
Another. Bloke for a change. Longtime friend off & on. Much older than I, not in good health. Smartest money investing person I'll ever know. Visited him a few days last month in a warm part of the country. Had a mild throat tickle the day before trip but very minor. I got sick when I returned home. Took a rona test day after I got back. Tested strong negative. Took pic of negative test, sent to him, caption: no rona. He didn't read it right or panicked or something & thought I had the rona. We were sms. I said nay I'm negative, have the flu mebbe or something else, not sure but it's not the rona. His reply, verbatim:
'I was so upset when I thought you gave me the rona I was gonna fly to your city, buy a gun, go to your house & shoot you in the head.'
And with that, a friendship since the 90s was immediately canceled, by me. Came close to relaying that written interstate threat with my local police department. Did share with a few friends with instructions to share with the PD in case anything does happen to me. He's a gun collector and I've seen him bend reality too often to take lightly.
Let's see...who else. Earlier this year my 1st little bro, now in his 30s, came very close to being canceled. He's a born again Christian & had never pushed that bronze age bullshit in my direction. But for some reason he decided to, over painfully long emails, explaining how deductive reasoning proves God exists or some such. Pages of this. Pages. He later apologized when he realized he didn't just cross the line he erased it. Presumably he'll muzzle that shite with me into the future (he did, we're fine now).
Can I pick em or can I pick em?