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Vampire Selfies

Craptastic recollections from an observant overthinker

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Work freaks24 Opinions21 Drugs & drink10 Personal shitshows10 Life in other cities9 Finances8 Wimminfolk8 Bicycling7 School days7 Travel stories7

Music6 Teenager6 Ignorance5 Breeders4 Race & religion3

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Posts

Cyclist crashes into me whilst belching a safety scolding

on July 27, 2024

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How I went from broke to living in a $10 million dollar mansion

on July 24, 2024

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That one time I was almost cancelled

on July 20, 2024

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The single worst week of all time

on July 16, 2024

Personal shitshows

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That time I toured the women's prison high as a kite

on July 05, 2024

Drugs & drink School days

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Think you have a bad virginity story?

on June 29, 2024

Teenager Wimminfolk

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That time my savant buddy made GHB in my house

on June 19, 2024

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Cascading dominos of friendship cancellations

on June 09, 2024

Personal shitshows

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Ambushed at the family cabin

on May 22, 2024

Personal shitshows

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Cyclist crashes into me whilst belching a safety scolding

Dateline: 2019. I'm riding a 5 x 2 paceline in the endless farmland west of Boise (ergo 10 bicyclists). We're rolling along at the usual 20 mph in the middle of nowhere. The guy next to me, on my right, decides it's a good time to lecture me about the importance of maintaining a steady pedaling cadence. Not for speed variations, as my speed is always steady. But just to keep my legs in motion. Sidebar: I've been pacelining (riding in tight formation w/others) since my first road bike, acquired in 1997. A Vitus 992 for those keeping score at home. Ergo, thousands of miles riding in tight formation, all over the country actually. Never once, not ever, an incident caused by me. Seen a few others. One memorable accident as an example. I was riding a 300 kilometer ride out of Athens, GA in the year of our lord 2015. There was 6 of us going single file. The rider ahead of me, the only female, was using aerobars. These are the elbow rests that lets the rider lean forward ...

How about don't get shot when pulled over by police

Most people have no appreciation or understanding how difficult the job of police officer is. I'm not in law enforcement, but I find the sentiment 'police are bad' ignorant. Classic example. Kneejerk outrage via this pic, Michigan, April 2022. Driver had outstanding (violence related) warrant, fake license plate, nonstop resisting officer commands, then running, fighting, then shot dead. Current example from a few days ago: Ricky Cobb II of Minneapolis. Basically, same exact story . Rinse & repeat. I've been pulled over several times, none recently. 2x for expired tags (my dumb), rolling stop sign (guilty), leaving 3 seconds before green on the highway on-ramp (despise them). All those are 10+ years ago. The most recent was 4 yrs ago, didn't pay attn to flashing yellows indicating school nearby. Pulled over for speeding. Guilty. Anyhoots, my point. I wasn't yakking back with the officer, bitching about 'why'd you stop me boo hoo' etc. I g...

I'm not a breeder. I don't care your kid made honor roll.

Dateline: since forever. I'm a non-breeder. I'm in the minority, apparently, in that I have no kids. Sans breeding. Not contributing to the destruction of the planet . Well, other than my bitcoin of course. Anyhoots, for my entire adult life I've been on the receiving of endless parenting stories. My kid did this! My kid did that! My kid is going to summer camp! My kid got their braces off! My kid got accepted to college! My kid got their driver's license! My kid got their first job! My kid got promoted! Etc. So what's the point of this blurb? In no nada zero cases, going back to eternity, has a parent declared: hey I know you have no kids but I'm certain you'll be just as fascinated with them as we are! Complete lack of awareness in their audience. This is precisely the same as me telling them (or everyone I meet, anywhere) about my latest piece of stereo equipment: I just bought a used Sanders Magtech amplifier! Unique power supply design...

Francis Mcgillicuddy

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